Wednesday, 12 March 2014

Lessons in Flowers

Aren't these flowers beautiful? I was with my Mum, eldest sister (over from the US) and neice yesterday. It was my sister's wedding anniversary, and her husband arranged for these lovely flowers. He messaged my Mum on Facebook, asking her to get flowers for the occasion, but she doesn't really "get" that feature. He could see no reply, so my niece was tasked with orienting her attention to the message. Then my Mum tasked me with going out to get the flowers. It was fun to conspire about it, and I love picking out flowers. I heard my sister thank her husband fulsomely over the phone.

Lesson 1: Look for the very best in people's actions. When my Mum first told me about the message, I thought, "Uh-oh, my sister is going to be so cross that he not only didn't arrange for flowers to be delivered in good time, but that he has bothered my Mum with it, giving her an extra task!" Of course, the reason I thought this is because that's how I would have reacted. I can be so judgemental, so ready to find fault with what people do, rather than seeing the good.

Lesson 2: Don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good. I get these ideas in my head of how things should be done. These ideas tend to be time-consuming and unrealistic. In my mind, after a dinner party I should send a card through the post to thank the hosts. Sometimes I get around to this, often I don't. This means I don't do anything at all, whereas it would be much better to send a quick text or e-mail of thanks every time, rather than an involved thank you note 25% of the time. It was much better for my sister's husband to do what he did rather than nothing. I would have done nothing at all -- the wrong choice.


  1. I was just pleased that one of us remembered this year. In that regard I am totally atypical. I think about women I have known who get all bent out of shape when their partner doesn't (to their mind) appropriately acknowledge events, and know that anyone I have been with is lucky indeed - smiley face!

    1. Yep, you are cheerful & low-maintenance, a gift to men-folk ;-)